interesting title to this first blog, kind of an anthesis to the blog's name...nevertheless i should start somewhere...even if it's not pixie*dust.
soo...sucks to be dumped...over and over again. not being able to hold on for more than a couple of months...but hey, "it's not you, it's me"...b***sh**!! for I AM the only common denominator in this equation...so apparently it's me...for choosing you!
this last experience was a bit overwhelming, unexpected and i believe the harshest, being one of the worst ways to dump someone...over the facebook chat. yes CHAT...on FACEBOOK! miles away.
i didn't have a clue the last time i kissed him just before christmas was the last time i would. the last embrace, the last whispers...the moments wasted longing for the romantic reunion...the passion, the love-making...i guess it was all useless day dreaming.
"500 days of summer" what a great break-up movie...i mean call me a masochist but in times like these i find myself sitting in the living room listening to ADELE or other love/love-less songs while watching some kind of romantic movie.
my now ex (since yesterday) and i used to have discussions over the Summer character, he always said she was a b**ch, whereas i always thought she was honest. she never promised him her love, she clipped his wings every once in a while...but she was honest from the beginning. funny, how this guy suddenly turned into my male version of Summer...with just a "i love you, but not like a girlfriend." and a "i never lied, i loved you...or i thought i did". Are you F-ing kidding me! Are you F-ing serious! HA! joke's on me...but NO!! he wasn't kidding...and he was very serious. even on chat i could depict his 'serious' tone. so after criticizing Summer for our entire relationship...he actually became her...worse he became her wicked self by going further and making promises he couldn't keep.
soo...this is not over...it takes a while to "turn my heart to stone", like ADELE sings...it's a difficult process...but it's also a rite of passage. not the first time i've gone through this...it's actually my lucky number quatre and it still hurts...but i've come realize it hurts less or as my mum says i've learned to control my emotions, i've matured.
"there's a fire starting in my heart..." *sniff* i am strong...I CAN DO IT ON MY OWN
P.S.: sorry for the multiple points, i am a bit difficult to understand i tend to have tons of type-os and sense-less sentences.
